One more from the blonde...

I'm sorry...these are all just coming back to me, and I consider them too priceless to keep to myself.

Blonde: "So where are you from?"

Me: "Los Angeles"

Blonde: Said in extremely giddy, high pitched voice. "Oh my God!! Do you know Britney Spears!?!"

More from the Oxford tour

Heard on a bus heading toward the Cotswolds.

Blonde is at it again. This time, she leans over to a married couple in our group, shows them side by side pictures of men buried alive during WWII, then asks:

"What would you prefer: to be buried upside down or right side up?"

Married couple: blank stares. "I guess upside down since you'd suffocate more quickly."

Blonde: "I dunno. I still say poison is the best way to go."

The bus: silence.

Oldies but goodies

Heard while at the Magdalen College Library, Oxford (2004). A little background first: my study group was given a tour of the library. There are many original transcripts of quite famous literary and scientific works. Many of which were written by the likes of Darwin, Milton, and others. Picture a southern blonde, peering over the display of works by Voltaire, Hugo, and I want to say Rousseau:

"Oh my God...isn't cool how they have all these books in French?"

My reaction: blank stare followed by, "Well, the authors were French."

Blonde: Fran Drescher laughter.

Oxford tour guide: rolls eyes, walks away.

Overheard: Tutor on Cell Phone

"Well, if they argue that women are oppressed under Islam (which in some cases might be true), we'll just argue that they are just as oppressed in Judaism and Christianity."

In Educational Psychology (or, Waste of Time 502)

"Well, if you look at the history of this country, and our actions. I mean, we dropped the A-bomb on Japan because we had more in common with Germans. They seemed more familiar than Asians. And our educational system shows the same preferences with instruction in English only. The system is set up that way to oppress everyone else." --Bleeding heart #23 in Ed. Psych class.

Yes, we dropped the bomb on Hiroshima because the Japanese have dark hair.

Genesis

I'm starting this blog because I need some cathartic outlet for the stupid, I mean, absolutely asinine things I overhear college grad students say. This venue will prevent me from approaching said...said..."philosophers" which will further prevent verbal sparring. Much cleaner this way.

So, the next posts will simply be quotes. Some will stand alone in their anti-brilliance. Others will have my response. Enjoy.